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Act IIIScene IA field near FrogmoreEnter Sir Hugh Evans and SimpleSir Hugh EvansI pray you now, good master Slender’s serving-man, and friend Simple by your name, which way have you looked for Master Caius, that calls himself doctor of physic?SimpleMarry, sir, the pittie-ward, the park-ward, every way; old Windsor way, and every way but the town way.Sir Hugh EvansI most fehemently desire you you will also look that way.SimpleI will, sir.ExitSir Hugh Evans’Pless my soul, how full of chollors I am, and trempling of mind! I shall be glad if he have deceived me. How melancholies I am! I will knog his urinals about his knave’s costard when I have good opportunities for the ork. ‘Pless my soul!SingsTo shallow rivers, to whose falls Melodious birds sings madrigals; There will we make our peds of roses, And a thousand fragrant posies. To shallow— Mercy on me! I have a great dispositions to cry.SingsMelodious birds sing madrigals— When as I sat in Pabylon— And a thousand vagram posies. To shallow &c.Re-enter SimpleSimpleYonder he is coming, this way, Sir Hugh.Sir Hugh EvansHe’s welcome.SingsTo shallow rivers, to whose falls—Heaven prosper the right! What weapons is he?SimpleNo weapons, sir. There comes my master, Master Shallow, and another gentleman, from Frogmore, over the stile, this way.Sir Hugh EvansPray you, give me my gown; or else keep it in your arms.Enter Page, Shallow, and SlenderShallowHow now, master Parson! Good morrow, good Sir Hugh. Keep a gamester from the dice, and a good student from his book, and it is wonderful.SlenderAsideAh, sweet Anne Page!Page’Save you, good Sir Hugh!Sir Hugh Evans’Pless you from his mercy sake, all of you!ShallowWhat, the sword and the word! do you study them both, master parson?PageAnd youthful still! in your doublet and hose this raw rheumatic day!Sir Hugh EvansThere is reasons and causes for it.PageWe are come to you to do a good office, master parson.Sir Hugh EvansFery well: what is it?PageYonder is a most reverend gentleman, who, belike having received wrong by some person, is at most odds with his own gravity and patience that ever you saw.ShallowI have lived fourscore years and upward; I never heard a man of his place, gravity and learning, so wide of his own respect.Sir Hugh EvansWhat is he?PageI think you know him; Master Doctor Caius, the renowned French physician.Sir Hugh EvansGot’s will, and his passion of my heart! I had as lief you would tell me of a mess of porridge.PageWhy?Sir Hugh EvansHe has no more knowledge in Hibocrates and Galen, —and he is a knave besides; a cowardly knave as you would desires to be acquainted withal.PageI warrant you, he’s the man should fight with him.ShallowAsideO sweet Anne Page!ShallowIt appears so by his weapons. Keep them asunder: here comes Doctor Caius.Enter Host, Doctor Caius, and RugbyPageNay, good master parson, keep in your weapon.ShallowSo do you, good master doctor.HostDisarm them, and let them question: let them keep their limbs whole and hack our English.Doctor CaiusI pray you, let-a me speak a word with your ear. Vherefore vill you not meet-a me?Sir Hugh EvansAside to Doctor CaiusPray you, use your patience: in good time.Doctor CaiusBy gar, you are de coward, de Jack dog, John ape.Sir Hugh EvansAside to Doctor CaiusPray you let us not be laughing-stocks to other men’s humours; I desire you in friendship, and I will one way or other make you amends.AloudI will knog your urinals about your knave’s cockscomb for missing your meetings and appointments.Doctor CaiusDiable! Jack Rugby,—mine host de Jarteer,—have I not stay for him to kill him? have I not, at de place I did appoint?Sir Hugh EvansAs I am a Christians soul now, look you, this is the place appointed: I’ll be judgement by mine host of the Garter.HostPeace, I say, Gallia and Gaul, French and Welsh, soul-curer and body-curer!Doctor CaiusAy, dat is very good; excellent.HostPeace, I say! hear mine host of the Garter. Am I politic? am I subtle? am I a Machiavel? Shall I lose my doctor? no; he gives me the potions and the motions. Shall I lose my parson, my priest, my Sir Hugh? no; he gives me the proverbs and the no-verbs. Give me thy hand, terrestrial; so. Give me thy hand, celestial; so. Boys of art, I have deceived you both; I have directed you to wrong places: your hearts are mighty, your skins are whole, and let burnt sack be the issue. Come, lay their swords to pawn. Follow me, lads of peace; follow, follow, follow.ShallowTrust me, a mad host. Follow, gentlemen, follow.SlenderAsideO sweet Anne Page!Exeunt Shallow, Slender, Page, and HostDoctor CaiusHa, do I perceive dat? have you make-a de sot of us, ha, ha?Sir Hugh EvansThis is well; he has made us his vlouting-stog. I desire you that we may be friends; and let us knog our prains together to be revenge on this same scall, scurvy cogging companion, the host of the Garter.Doctor CaiusBy gar, with all my heart. He promise to bring me where is Anne Page; by gar, he deceive me too.Sir Hugh EvansWell, I will smite his noddles. Pray you, follow.Exeunt

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William Shakespeare: Merry Wives of Windsor, Act II, Scene III

  • William Shakespeare: Merry Wives of Windsor, Act II, Scene III

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TrendingHere are the facts and trivia that people are buzzing about.

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  • Did Birds Evolve from Dinosaurs?
  • The Twelve Dancing Princesses
  • Current Events This Week: January 2023
  • African Americans by the Numbers
  • Andersen’s Fairy Tales: Contents
  • The Celtic Twilight: A Teller of Tales