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  • William Shakespeare: Merry Wives of Windsor, Act I, Scene IV

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Scene IVA room in Doctor Caius’ houseEnter Mistress Quickly, Simple, and RugbyMistress QuicklyWhat, John Rugby! I pray thee, go to the casement, and see if you can see my master, Master Doctor Caius, coming. If he do, i’ faith, and find any body in the house, here will be an old abusing of God’s patience and the king’s English.RugbyI’ll go watch.Mistress QuicklyGo; and we’ll have a posset for’t soon at night, in faith, at the latter end of a sea-coal fire.Exit RugbyAn honest, willing, kind fellow, as ever servant shall come in house withal, and, I warrant you, no tell-tale nor no breed-bate: his worst fault is, that he is given to prayer; he is something peevish that way: but nobody but has his fault; but let that pass. Peter Simple, you say your name is?SimpleAy, for fault of a better.Mistress QuicklyAnd Master Slender’s your master?SimpleAy, forsooth.Mistress QuicklyDoes he not wear a great round beard, like a glover’s paring-knife?SimpleNo, forsooth: he hath but a little wee face, with a little yellow beard, a Cain-coloured beard.Mistress QuicklyA softly-sprighted man, is he not?SimpleAy, forsooth: but he is as tall a man of his hands as any is between this and his head; he hath fought with a warrener.Mistress QuicklyHow say you? O, I should remember him: does he not hold up his head, as it were, and strut in his gait?SimpleYes, indeed, does he.Mistress QuicklyWell, heaven send Anne Page no worse fortune! Tell Master Parson Evans I will do what I can for your master: Anne is a good girl, and I wish—Re-enter RugbyRugbyOut, alas! here comes my master.Mistress QuicklyWe shall all be shent. Run in here, good young man; go into this closet: he will not stay long.Shuts Simple in the closetWhat, John Rugby! John! what, John, I say! Go, John, go inquire for my master; I doubt he be not well, that he comes not home.SingingAnd down, down, adown-a, &c.Enter Doctor CaiusDoctor CaiusVat is you sing? I do not like des toys. Pray you, go and vetch me in my closet un boitier vert, a box, a green-a box: do intend vat I speak? a green-a box.Mistress QuicklyAy, forsooth; I’ll fetch it you.AsideI am glad he went not in himself: if he had found the young man, he would have been horn-mad.Doctor CaiusFe, fe, fe, fe! ma foi, il fait fort chaud. Je m’en vais a la cour—la grande affaire.Mistress QuicklyIs it this, sir?Doctor CaiusOui; mette le au mon pocket: depeche, quickly. Vere is dat knave Rugby?Mistress QuicklyWhat, John Rugby! John!RugbyHere, sir!Doctor CaiusYou are John Rugby, and you are Jack Rugby. Come, take-a your rapier, and come after my heel to the court.Rugby’Tis ready, sir, here in the porch.Doctor CaiusBy my trot, I tarry too long. Od’s me! Qu’ai-j’oublie! dere is some simples in my closet, dat I vill not for the varld I shall leave behind.Mistress QuicklyAy me, he’ll find the young man here, and be mad!Doctor CaiusO diable, diable! vat is in my closet? Villain! larron!Pulling Simple outRugby, my rapier!Mistress QuicklyGood master, be content.Doctor CaiusWherefore shall I be content-a?Mistress QuicklyThe young man is an honest man.Doctor CaiusWhat shall de honest man do in my closet? dere is no honest man dat shall come in my closet.Mistress QuicklyI beseech you, be not so phlegmatic. Hear the truth of it: he came of an errand to me from Parson Hugh.Doctor CaiusVell.SimpleAy, forsooth; to desire her to—Mistress QuicklyPeace, I pray you.Doctor CaiusPeace-a your tongue. Speak-a your tale.SimpleTo desire this honest gentlewoman, your maid, to speak a good word to Mistress Anne Page for my master in the way of marriage.Mistress QuicklyThis is all, indeed, la! but I’ll ne’er put my finger in the fire, and need not.Doctor CaiusSir Hugh send-a you? Rugby, baille me some paper. Tarry you a little-a while.WritesMistress QuicklyAside to SimpleI am glad he is so quiet: if he had been thoroughly moved, you should have heard him so loud and so melancholy. But notwithstanding, man, I’ll do you your master what good I can: and the very yea and the no is, the French doctor, my master,—I may call him my master, look you, for I keep his house; and I wash, wring, brew, bake, scour, dress meat and drink, make the beds and do all myself,—SimpleAside to Mistress Quickly’Tis a great charge to come under one body’s hand.Mistress QuicklyAside to SimpleAre you avised o’ that? you shall find it a great charge: and to be up early and down late; but notwithstanding,—to tell you in your ear; I would have no words of it,—my master himself is in love with Mistress Anne Page: but notwithstanding that, I know Anne’s mind,—that’s neither here nor there.Doctor CaiusYou jack’nape, give-a this letter to Sir Hugh; by gar, it is a shallenge: I will cut his troat in dee park; and I will teach a scurvy jack-a-nape priest to meddle or make. You may be gone; it is not good you tarry here. By gar, I will cut all his two stones; by gar, he shall not have a stone to throw at his dog:Exit SimpleMistress QuicklyAlas, he speaks but for his friend.Doctor CaiusIt is no matter-a ver dat: do not you tell-a me dat I shall have Anne Page for myself? By gar, I vill kill de Jack priest; and I have appointed mine host of de Jarteer to measure our weapon. By gar, I will myself have Anne Page.Mistress QuicklySir, the maid loves you, and all shall be well. We must give folks leave to prate: what, the good-jer!Doctor CaiusRugby, come to the court with me. By gar, if I have not Anne Page, I shall turn your head out of my door. Follow my heels, Rugby.Exeunt Doctor Caius and RugbyMistress QuicklyYou shall have An fool’s-head of your own. No, I know Anne’s mind for that: never a woman in Windsor knows more of Anne’s mind than I do; nor can do more than I do with her, I thank heaven.FentonWithinWho’s within there? ho!Mistress QuicklyWho’s there, I trow! Come near the house, I pray you.Enter FentonFentonHow now, good woman? how dost thou?Mistress QuicklyThe better that it pleases your good worship to ask.FentonWhat news? how does pretty Mistress Anne?Mistress QuicklyIn truth, sir, and she is pretty, and honest, and gentle; and one that is your friend, I can tell you that by the way; I praise heaven for it.FentonShall I do any good, thinkest thou? shall I not lose my suit?Mistress QuicklyTroth, sir, all is in his hands above: but notwithstanding, Master Fenton, I’ll be sworn on a book, she loves you. Have not your worship a wart above your eye?FentonYes, marry, have I; what of that?Mistress QuicklyWell, thereby hangs a tale: good faith, it is such another Nan; but, I detest, an honest maid as ever broke bread: we had an hour’s talk of that wart. I shall never laugh but in that maid’s company! But indeed she is given too much to allicholy and musing: but for you—well, go to.FentonWell, I shall see her to-day. Hold, there’s money for thee; let me have thy voice in my behalf: if thou seest her before me, commend me.Mistress QuicklyWill I? i’faith, that we will; and I will tell your worship more of the wart the next time we have confidence; and of other wooers.FentonWell, farewell; I am in great haste now.Mistress QuicklyFarewell to your worship.Exit FentonTruly, an honest gentleman: but Anne loves him not; for I know Anne’s mind as well as another does. Out upon’t! what have I forgot?Exit

William Shakespeare: Merry Wives of Windsor, Act I

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William Shakespeare: Merry Wives of Windsor, Act III, Scene II

  • William Shakespeare: Merry Wives of Windsor, Act III, Scene II

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  • Did Birds Evolve from Dinosaurs?
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  • Current Events This Week: January 2023
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  • The Celtic Twilight: A Teller of Tales